When Sex Hurts . . . . .
What You Can Do
For most women, most of the time, sex is a pleasureable, enjoyable experience that is both erotically pleasing and physically enjoyable.
But for some women, the words "intercourse" and "pain" go hand in hand .
When this happens suddenly - particulalry if sex has always been pleasurable for you in the past - then you should suspect a vaginal infection - or sometimes a pelvic condition. This can include endometriosis ( a menstrrual-related disorder), pelvic inflammatory disease ( often the result of an intimate infecton) adhesions or scar tissue from a previous surgery, an ovarian cyst or tumor, or sometimes even a small tear in the ligament that supports your uterus.
If you suspect an infection - if you also have a discharge for example, or pelvic or uterine pain - then see your doctor rigtht away. Usually, a round of antibiotic can clear your infection and return your system to normal.
If uterine or ovarian problems are at the root of your pain, often, hormone therapy can help - including birth control pills.
But in the event that your doctor doesn't find a specific reason for your painful sex, your problem may be linked to a condition known as dyspareunia. In simplist terms, this is a lack of lubrication that makes friction between the penis and vagina so painful that intercourse becomes difficult or impossible.
Among the most common causes is inadquate stimulation prior to intercourse. Indeed, if your partner is "ready" before you are, the result can be pain upon entry.
The solution here is to work with your partner to extend foreplay - or to use an artificial lubricant to supply the extra help you need to reduce the friction. This should also substantially reduce the pain and make sex a lot more comfortable.
The Vaginal Muscle That Stops Sex
If, even after adequate lubrication, sex still causes you pain, you may be one of small group of women affected by a muscle-related problem known as vaginismus.
This occurs when muscles in the outer portion of your vagina contract to such a degree that penetration becomes extremely difficult for your partner - and intolerable for you.
In essence, the vagina is tightening to such an extent, your partner literally can't get through.
Vaginimus can occur for a number of reasons - including fear of contracting a sexually transmitted disease. It can sometimes also occur after a sexual trauma - or one you relate to sex.
If you believe this may be the case for you, talk to your doctor. Often, you can learn a series of desensitization exercises that can actually teach your vaginal muscles how to relax.
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